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Women Still Attractive After 30

January 10, 2006January 10, 2006FranciscoEditorialsLeave a comment

My significant other, usually I call her My Woman, not because it’s particularly sexist and macho of me, but because we are not married but have been together for over ten years now, and so I find it appropiate to say My Woman, instead of the woman I’ve been attached with for a decade now or perhaps my lover, but anyway to get to the point of this, is that as a man you get older and while you would like to think that 16 year old girls are perfect, the truth is that most women bore me, and not just the younger ones.

What happens is that external looks like nice breasts, thighs, face, whatever fade and while young women are certainly in their prime when it comes to their looks, they are also not very interesting. Older women have a certain confidence that makes them sexy, that is if their bitterness has not completely corrupted their personalities. More importantly they know things, like how to make love, what a good book is, and even if they don’t know how to cook, they at least know a good dining establishment to go to.

My woman told me a story about how a man my age, was caught by his wife having sex in his office with his assistant. His wife at the time had already had two children and was going through cancer treatment, if I remember correctly. I totally understood where that man was coming from. He was bored. He still loved his wife and kids, I’m sure, but he was definitely bored and stupidly tempted by a younger woman.

Chris Rock has this great joke about how a man is only as faithful as his opportunities; if she chases you, you can’t run that fast! I’m sure most men would want to think that way, but it is usually more likely that the man never runs away to begin with, if he’s bored or having trouble communicating with his partner.

Like I said, women over 30 are sexy, even if their youthful looks are fleeting. It really is too bad that women in the western world are paranoid about their looks. I always remember this scene In The Heart of Darkness, where the narrator describes the African woman on the bank of the river. There’s nothing more sexual than an openly confident woman.

My advice to young women, stop worrying about your looks, read some more good books, and never accept any man’s shortcomings. To women in their 30’s or older, you should already know this, and if you ever catch your man cheating on you, well you already know why he did it, you just have to decide what you are going to do about it.

The Gay Jedi Mind Trick

January 10, 2006December 11, 2006FranciscoFilms1 Comment

The next Star Wars film is due shortly in theaters across the US, and once again I can not resist the urge to write a short rant on how gay the actual Star Wars Universe is.

Not that I particularly hate Star Wars or anything, and not that a gay reading of Star Wars is the only one possible, because even before I thought of it as gay, I tended to criticize it as a piece that reinforced colonialism; this reading is especially interesting now because the new trilogy is all about how the Republic was broken up to institute the dictatorship of The Emperor.

After watching the Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back film, and seeing how Kevin Smith poked fun at himself and his characters, I thought, wow, maybe Star Wars really is gay, and I’m not stretching this out as much as I thought. So without further hesitation, here is why Stars Wars is totally gay:

The crisis in the story is all about Anakin and how he becomes Darth Vader and later of course saves the galaxy by joining his son Luke in destroying the Emperor. Most people would interpret this story as a simply good versus evil, but if we learned anything from postmodernism, I would say that the real catalyst for Anakin is his sexual identity.

In Episode One, Anakin is a child and he has no sexual relationships. This is when he meets Padme Amidala, perhaps the only other woman besides his mother who he has a relationship with. At the same time, he also meets the Jedis and is set on a path that will lead him to become a Jedi himself. Once he is separated from his mother and Padme, he becomes inducted into the Master-Pupil relationship of the Jedi society. If you know your classical works, specifically Plato and Socrates, you recognize at least some small hint of homo-eroticism in the Jedi order. Namely that the Jedi relationship with their pupils is indeed based on classical Greek and Roman education. Padme herself talks about her own political career and how it comes about; her very description of it points to Plato’s own The Republic. The Jedi order is exactly the same, a Jedi owns no property and is educated to serve the society.

When Anakin then meets Padme again, he is older and by now he has already been inducted into the order of the Jedi, almost graduating to full Jedi. What the films never talk about is that Padme is older than Anakin and wiser, and while Anakin lacks world experience and perhaps wisdom, Padme is an observant and practical politician. She herself understands her position and the restrictions it has placed upon her personally. I’m not entirely secure in this, but I see Padme as being gay herself. She does not really love Anakin as a sexual partner, but she does pity him and she does see an advantage to maintaining her own freedom in a society that approves of males being somewhat gay, but frowns upon the notion of lesbianism. In Star Wars, the universe is still male dominated and women while having positions of power, still do not hold the position of true independant agency. Padme chooses to give herself to Anakin, but Anakin is one confused male. It is only with his mother’s passing that he gains any real focus, because unlike Padme who only pities him and the Jedi Council who only see him as a tool, a soldier, his mother was in fact the only person who actually did love him unconditionally. It remains to be seen if Padme later abondons Anakin or if the actual physical relationship of straight sex turns him off completely to sex and leads him to the path of becoming Darth Vader, the ultimate Jedi eunuch.

Since Star Wars takes so much from Greek Tragedy, and the Gods never forget, it is only fitting that the sexual identity crisis continues in the family and that years later a brother and sister, find themselves kissing and having feelings for eachother. I also have some doubts about Han and Chewy being straight too, and as for Lando, perhaps the only character that comes close to not being gay, I think of him as being bi-sexual at the very least. He had a thing for Han too.

I should end this with a mention of The Empire and just how gay they are. While the Jedi Council maintains a Master-Pupil relationship, the darkside Jedis make no secret of their sexual preference. The Empire abhores even the presence of women. I have yet to see a female in their ranks. Their army of male clones is of course the most evident sign that they have completely abondoned women for all purposes, not just for sex, but even for reproduction.

Simply the Male Phallis is everywhere in Star Wars.

Where’s The Center Game?

January 10, 2006February 17, 2017FranciscoNBA TalkLeave a comment

The Houston Rockets are most likely set to make the playoffs this year, but they have so far failed to tap the potential of their center big man: Yao Ming.

It has been a very frustrating season for Yao and fans, as they watch game after game in which the rest of the Rockets, (with the exception of Tracy McGrady at times), fail to properly pass Yao the ball. Most often Yao’s teammates pass the ball below the waist to a center who is more than seven feet tall! How exactly is Yao going to bend down, pick up a ball and rotate to get position, and let alone get a good shot in? This is one reason why Yao is having so much trouble scoring and then there are the occasional fouls that he picks up trying to maintain possession with such bad passes.

Critics end up blaming Yao for not being aggressive enough or for committing a stupid foul, but they miss the most obvious problem with the NBA game, namely that guards don’t know how to properly pass to a tall center. One can’t help but wonder if the Suns success this year is due in part, to Nash being one of the few guards who actually does feed his center the right passes, and who does create actual plays for Amare to have an open lane to the basket. Think about how crowded the lane is when Yao actually gets the ball, is that really the time for Yao to shoot? I don’t think so. The Rockets would do better to spread the game out and aim the passes at his chest or higher when he has room. This is not impossible, it just means the Rockets need to commit to this and make Yao practice his moves. By comparison, take Kevin Garnet and Tim Duncan, part of their success is getting the ball passed up high and practicing their pump fakes and shots. Yao is already a good mid range shooter, he just needs a little more practice with his fakes and foot work. But he will need his teammates to make the proper passes. So far this has not been happening, instead Yao is expected to be Shaq-like and dominate his man each and every time. This would make the game harder for any center except Shaq, but then again, in last year’s finals, the passes never came for him either! And that could be why the Lakers lost so easily to the Pistons.