Our Dog Butters

Butters chews his boneThis summer, the girlfriend decided she was finally getting a dog. She has been wanting one for years now and our two boys are old enough now that they can help out. I tried to convince her that we really did not need a dog, and that instead we should have another baby. Somehow, the 39 weeks of pregnancy with all the throwing up and other personal discomforts did not appeal to her. Sometime in June, she brought home a yellow lab puppy who I ended up naming Butters, after the South Park character. The name fits, cause Butters is not very smart, gets into trouble all the time, and is sometimes a pain.

Butters is now about five months old and is a medium size dog. He has gone through multiple leashes and harnesses (all of which he has destroyed)! However the thing he loves best are my socks! He is absolutely enamored with them. After spending most of the summer with the dog, I have learned the following:

  • A dog can add stress to your life.
  • A lot of people love dogs, I meet someone new every week just by walking Butters.
  • Dogs love socks more than chasing rabbits.
  • You have to teach puppies to lift their leg when they pee, this is something they have to be taught!
  • Their sense of smell is their most important sense of all. They smell constantly.

I’d have to say, that I’m surprised that Butters has not destroyed the house. My stereo equipment has been left untouched. Katryn has enforced a lot of rules on him and he has followed through on most of them. The hard part of course has been the constant training. I look forward to the day when I can let Butters in the living room and not have to worry about him getting in trouble.

Summer of 91

Roar of a GM engine, and gust of speeding metal on interstate road, some times I wonder, limitless is the sky, heavy the chains that try and hold me down, but I am young, strong, and heroic. The hero never falls, he only picks himself up and rams his fist into the wind, only God can calm his fury, but his hunger knows no bounds. I am he. Don’t think too much, just drive on through, miles the summer heat, but by my side my woman lays. The scent of feminine perfume and sweet thighs I have climbed. This is the summer of 91. My car, my girl, the road. My last ride before the storm. The final words to be said before the dawn of manhood and all that lays upon that journey.

Worthless Internet News

Like most everyone today, I’m a hardcore Internet news junkie, but it seems that every week the same story is reprinted and after a while this gets pretty annoying. This is why I’ve put together a list of things I never ever want to read ever again on the Internet.

The Beatles And Paul McCarthy Story

The Beatles broke up in 1970, they made a few good songs, and for the most part I think they sucked! I don’t care if their music is ever available on iTunes and care even less about McCarthy and his lawsuits against Apple. I never ever want to see another Digg story on The Beatles ever again! The only Beatle that was ever cool was George Harrison anyway.

Lindsay Lohan

A short and ginger girl who parties all the time and who can’t seem to control herself. Why is this news? She’s got some talent, but so does Mandy Moore and and Moore is actually better looking. Don’t these young actresses know that alcohol makes you look worse, not better?

Paris Hilton

Worse than Lohan is Hilton. The world does not care how rich or untalented Hilton is, so why does the media flood us with stories of this sad woman?

WMD Story

After billions of dollars spent on the Iraq war and countless lives lost, I think anyone who still saids there were huge stockpiles of WMD’s in Iraq is a total idiot. Let’s face it, Saddam was a small time dictator and not the giant threat that the Bush administration made him out to be. There is no need to continue talking about why we started this war, the conversation needs to be about how we end the war and help solve this huge mess.

Apple’s iPhone and iPod

Yes, Apple’s iPhone and iPods are cool, but until you actually have something important to write about, do not publish another story on how Apple might update the iPod or how the iPhone might have this feature, just freaking wait until Apple saids it. Stop giving Apple all this free publicity.

Celebrities Getting Married or Pregnant

No one cares about anyone getting married anymore, we just care about the divorces. So just publish the divorce stories and we will be happy with those. Use to be a time when people would not talk about getting pregnant, nowadays, having a baby is like having a fashionable accessory. If you don’t have an iPod and a baby, somehow you are not a fashionable celebrity. Stop it. Having a family is not a fashion statement, so please no more pictures of so and so’s baby. Just let celebrities have their families and their private life.

Microsoft Versus Linux

Microsoft is no longer an innovative company. It has become stagnant and predictable. There is no need to publish any stories about how Microsoft hates Linux and open source, everyone knows that Microsoft is expensive and open source is cheaper. The constant chatter about the whole debate is pointless. Microsoft sucks, and so does Linux. Just pick the one that sucks less for you.